a rotten week

Ever notice how God has incredible timing?  Chad and I are reading through the Bible this year with my brother's Sunday School class.  Where are we this week?  Job.  Ever read Job?  I have, but this week it takes on a whole new meaning.  I have to be careful in reading because too often, especially in the Old Testament, I sum up the story in my head and mentally move on, even if I'm still reading.  Job - good guy who suffered, bad friends, complained to God, God answered, God restored.  Done.  It takes on a little different meaning when you remember Job was a person.  He had a fingerprint.  His kids had names.  He had an address.  You get my point.  He's not a character - he was a person.  He lost all ten of his kids in the same day.  He lost all his wealth.  He was in excruciating physical pain.  How would I feel if my girls both died, my house burned down, my bank account evaporated...all in one day.  

Whether you've read Job or not, here's my point.  At the heart of the book is the age old question - why do the righteous suffer?  Why do bad things happen to good people? 

This was a truly rotten week.  

On the lighter end of the scale I went to the dentist to left with the news I have 5 cavities.  Seriously?  How does that happen?  I am very careful about taking care of  my teeth, or so I thought. 

I also went to the doctor for some tests.  Top of the list of possibilities - celiacs disease.  For someone who loves food, the thought of no wheat the rest of my life is a little disheartening.  I've been so physically exhausted this week though, that anything is better than this.  One day Mya said, "Mommy, your tummy hurt?"  "No, it doesn't sweetie."  "You just tired?"  "Yes, Mommy is very tired."  "Its ok Mommy, you tired a lot."  :( 

Chad lost another West Point classmate.  A Kiowa crashed in Afghanistan, bringing the dreaded knock on the door to 2 more families.  

Two dear friends have had the rug of their life pulled out from under them.  Nothing in their lives is working out like they planned.  They have been hurt, felt betrayed, faced injustice, all while watching the ones they love lose part of what made them who they are.  I have sat by and watched, feeling incredibly helpless to ease their pain.  

Then on Wednesday our family received the news that a dear friend is dying.  The Browning Family has been like our second family growing up.  Our parents have been friends for 34 years.  Growing up we pretty much lived at church - Sunday morning, Sunday nights, Wednesday night, Awanas, bus routes, cleaning the gym, and any special serving in between.  The Brownings were always with us!  The Brownings and my parents counted the money after church.  We went out to eat every Sunday night to Showneys.  They bought a lot down the street from us and built a house.  We road to school together.  We were together a lot.  

One word comes to mind when I think of Bro. Mark - faithful.  He has been faithful to the Lord, faithful to his family and faithful to share the gospel with as many people as possible.  He loves the Lord and has taught so many of us so much about the Bible.  He never really sugar coated things or watered it down.  I think that is what makes him such a great teacher.  

If you ask him how he's doing, you will always get the same answer, "Moderate." 

If you ask him if he was going to doing something or go somewhere he will always say, "Lord wiling."

The quote he is most famous for however is what was his typical greeting: to parents "Spanked your kids today?" to kids - "Had your spankings yet today?" "A spanking a day keeps the devil away."  It may sound silly if you don't know him, but just hearing him say that in my head, brings a smile to my face. 

On Wednesday Bro. Mark was diagnosed with a disease called sporadic CJD.  It basically destroys the brain at a very rapid pace.  About a month ago he went in for testing for some mild symptoms and now he already slipping away.  The doctors say he only has a few months to live, but given his rapid decline, it may not be that long. 

Mrs. Wendy and Bro. Mark

This news has been very hard on our family.  The group of people that we grew up with at church, "the Old Grace" people, are very tight knit.  Bro. Mark has been a pillar in our lives and it is heart wrenching to think of him not being here. The watching our friends in pain is even more difficult.  

One thing that I do not like about military life is that I'm not sure my girls will have a Mark Browning in their life.  They won't be some where long enough to say they've known someone their whole life.  Their influences will be different and come in different ways.  I pray that somehow, the Lord would bring people like the Brownings into my girls lives.  That they would have heros of the faith to look to as examples.  I am thankful our families can help fill that void in their lives as well. 

So back to Job.  Why do good people suffer?  Why does a great man of God like Mark Browning contract such a terrible disease at such a relatively young age?  Why is life so unfair sometimes?  I of course don't have the answer, but my guess is this... It is the same answer I give to my girls that they never fully understand - "Because."  But because why?  Just because I can't articulate to my girls the exact why behind my answer, doesn't take away from the wisdom in which the answer was given.  

God knows.  We have to trust. I don't think God let Job go through trials so that at the end of it He could explain to Job why.  Maybe He just wanted Job to know Him in a deeper way, that he never would have without the trials. A friend's blog said it well - do we care more about getting out of our situation or becoming more like Christ?  Bro. Mark would want the pain of this situation to draw us closer to Christ.  That is what I want for my friends.  That while they sit in the heaps of pieces that once was the world they knew, that somehow they can see God in the midst.  Not see the good - there may not be any good to the situation.  Not understand the why - we may never understand the why.  But just know Him more.  Find Him to be the comfort in the midst of the storm. Find Him to be the only reason we need.  

I love this song.  It has been my anthem this week.  God is faithful.  No matter where we are or what we are going through, He is unchanging.  Today I am thankful He is faithful.